Day 36: Was Brutal

I had to go to campus yesterday.

When I left in mid-March, I never expected that I would be teaching my summer classes online from my home. I brought what I needed for the end of the semester, but I had to go back yesterday to pick up my summer materials.

We have gates on campus, and they are generally open during the day. Now, though, they are closed, and the guard house is fully operational. I had to stop on the way in to show my campus ID and be checked in. As I drove through the gate, all I saw was emptiness. Spring is absolutely gorgeous on campus, but there were no students out taking pictures of the blooms. No one was walking to class. My car was the only one I saw.

I walked into my building and turned the lights on at 10:15. The classrooms are locked up tight. There were no student messages on my board or flyers pinned to the cork board. It was silent.

I gathered what I needed and was leaving again in less than an hour. I turned the lights off at 11.

As I was leaving, the chapel bells were ringing the hour, and it literally echoed across our empty campus. And I broke.

I love the energy of a college campus. I love looking out my window and seeing students. I love listening to their chatter in the hallways. I love having them leave random notes on my board and stop in with big ideas. It shouldn't be so quiet.

I am missing my students so much it hurts right now. This is always a time of launching seniors and listening to big summer plans. I'm still talking with them online or via email, but it's just not the same.

I cannot wait to see our campus full of life again, and I cannot wait to hear all that chatter in the hallway again.