It Finally Happened

Issa now has spelling homework, and we shed our first homework tears last night. Over this:

She has to write each word three times on Tuesday night, and she did them all perfectly without having to look at the list. She finds spelling pretty easy right now. It's the writing.

I've mentioned before that handwriting is not Issa's strong suit. Her teacher wants them to use two lines for each word, and she wants the letters to touch all the correct lines. Issa finds this ridiculous. If she can spell the word, and other people can read it, why should it matter?

You can see the eraser marks--her own doing--as she tried to follow the rules. There were tears of frustration, and I struggled. I understand the need for neat writing, but I also totally understand Issa's point. Who cares?

I hate it when my work meets parenting. As a critical theorist, I want to tell her to screw the rules. They are stupid and pointless and created by a small subset of curriculum developers. There is no research to connect handwriting to jack. Write however you want. Damn the torpedoes.

As a momma, I want her to do well in school, though, and that means following rules and writing neatly. I also hate to see her in tears; it breaks my heart.

So...I left it to her. I tried to explain both sides, and I held her until she stopped crying. I told her I wouldn't erase anything she wrote, and she could choose how she did the assignment. I would help her explain her thoughts in a note if she chose not to worry about writing over two lines instead of one. Or...she could follow the rules and write over two lines, trying to make each letter touch all the right places.

This time, she chose the rules, and my heart broke just a little as I praised her effort. She finished the assignment as given--well done. She chose not to fight the battle--the better part of valor. I just don't want to see her lose her fight.

And I just keep waiting for this parenting gig to get a little easier...