My Village

I have often written here about how it truly does take a village to raise children--both for the kids and the mamas. I love being part of that village, but some days, it's more difficult than others.

I love being the one offering encouragement, support, or help. I love knowing that I have friends to lean on when I need help. But...asking isn't always so easy. I'm working on it, and I'm trying to be more mindful about it. I preach that it is always okay to ask for help--to my kids, to my friends, to my students--but I'm not great about asking. Guilt gets in the way on so many levels. Why can't I manage it? Why can't I find a way to get it all finished and be there for the kids? What if people get annoyed by my asking? These are my hang ups, and I'm learning to let them go.

This month has been good practice. Brad has been traveling more, and the pace of life has picked up. Here's what I know: we are making it. My village is there--when I ask and when I don't.

I had to ask another dance mom to take Issa to class this week. She was happy to help, and when I shared my own fears she literally laughed and me and told me to get over myself. I love her a little more every day.

We needed help with soccer this week, and Mr. Ryan stepped up to the plate. Evan is thrilled, and I am thrilled that he has his own little cheering section.

Last night, Miss Steph surprised Evan to watch his game. Daddy and Issa were there, but I was teaching. When I got home, I saw Steph had stayed to help with homework and hang out for a while. We got to catch up a little bit, and I got to watch my kids have time with someone they adore and who adores them.

As I was driving to work, stuck in traffic with extra time to think, I finally realized that having a village isn't just about me. I might feel fabulous when I get to help someone, and I might need the help on some days more than others. That is the nuts and bolts of it. What I realized was the village is about our family--biological and extended. It's about knowing that we have a gift in the form of people we love and who love us. It's about belonging to each other, and I am so grateful to keep learning from our little village.