Being a mom to young children is tough...said every mother ever if she's honest with herself. It's a lot of the same thing over and over and over. The munchkins needs to eat at the same time every day. They insist on wearing clean clothes that they just get dirty all over again. For some reason, they need roughly six million glasses every day. It's a lot of monotonous work. It can be exhausting. Throw in the hard, complicated questions and conversations and sometimes I think we all wonder which end is up.
But there are shiny moments. Snuggles and laughter and one liners. Watching them sleep and explore and grow. My favorite moments, though, are the ones where we can actually fix things just because we're the mama and mamas know how to fix it. When both of the kids were little, they would hand me things and say, "Mama fix." It was never a question--just a statement because Mama could fix anything.
As they've gotten older, I don't hear "Mama fix" any more. And Issa is already bringing me some tough stuff that I can't necessarily just fix for her. That is one of the hardest things for me: letting them learn to fight their own battles and answer their own struggles. I so want to just fix everything for the rest of their lives. But I know I can't...and even if I could I shouldn't.
Perhaps it's because we're on the brink of tween years that last night was such a welcome moment. I came home from work late, and Evan announced he was not friends with Neela at the moment. Okay...good to know. Then he showed me why:
A few stitches later and he was good as new. I tucked him in beside Evan, and this morning I got to watch his face light up when he saw him, "Mama, you fixed him!" Seeing his little face light up made the piles of laundry and breakfast dishes all worth it. This mama gig may be tough, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.
Kiddos, I might not always be able to fix everything for you. But know with every fiber of your being that I will always be here. I will always be beside you, behind you, or in front of you--where ever you need me. I will be your biggest cheerleader when you struggle to fix it yourself, and when you start to feel like you can't, I will be right there to help you...always.